New Year

Today is the beginning of a new year. I am not quite ready to say "Happy" just because things are kind of scary. I have lots to do this new month. I have to move out of this condo by myself. My roommate isn't going to help. I am going to have to find a job. I am going to have to find a place to stay. I am going to have to find some money to live. I would rather not sell my Mother's wedding ring, but it may come to that. I don't know how much I would get for it, but maybe enough to cover the rental of a moving van. At the beginning of this new year, it is tempting to look back at the previous year. In many ways, it has been a wonderful year. The terrible stress that Macy's put on me has gone away. I have enjoyed being in the mountains and having a change of scenery. I have enjoyed renewing my friendship with Mary and the anticipation of selling my stuff in a store. Unfortunately, it didn't quite do what I thought. I think it was the advertising or lack thereof. I have enjoyed being able to do stuff that I wanted to do. I have also enjoyed building strong relationships with Joni, Aubrey, and Ne'cole. I don't think that would have happened without my moving, and now I have realized how important it is to be closer to friends. With so few people that I can say are family, my friends are now my family. Thanks guys for keeping me alive. Regrets? Yes, but I am not going to dwell on regrets. Anyone, who has read this blog, knows the regrets. Joni told me something recently that I have appreciated. She told me to be positive. Know that things are going to get better. And that brings me to the word that is going to have to frame this new year for me. The word is "Believe". I have to believe that things are going to be better. A life that is better. Forget the bad stuff of last year and dwell on what is to come. My friendships get stronger. Meanwhile, let me say something about the present. I was moving some stuff yesterday, and my car started making a noise I haven't heard before. I am going to need some money to move. If you can spare $10 or $100, please send it to me via PayPal. My acct. is durst11@gmail.com. It pains me to ask, but I am going to have to rent a moving van, and I don't have the money to do it. I am learning to believe in myself. Please believe in me. And, let's have a good year together. Happy New Year.