My Life

Over the past few months, I have been trying to find a job with no luck. I know times are tough. You don't have to tell me that. Many people have said they are praying for me. And, I appreciate that. But, as I have looked around for someone to let me stay with them, I have come up empty. I have been staying at a motel in town, but I am about to run out of money and will no longer be able to afford it. So, what is the alternative? I don't know. I do have my car, but I do not want to have to live in it. In this blog, over the last few weeks, I have tried not to get negative. For one reason, it takes too much energy. For another, I am trying to stay positive. And for another reason, I didn't know if any employer might read my blog and think badly of me. So, I have tried to keep putting a positive spin on things. But, it is time for a reality check. So, here is the reality. I don't have enough money to make it through the end of this week. I am sinking back into a depressed state. I really don't want to be at the point I was around Christmas. That was just too horrible. I am back to a day to day existence. It would help if someone believed in me financially. I don't mind criticism, but right now, I need someone to pat me on the back and tell me that I am okay. A hug to tell me that I am all right. Something. I know that there are people out there who are in bad shape. I am not the only one. But, I hate to say what I am about to, but let's just lay it all out. When I attended the funeral last week, I had thoughts as to me being in that casket. I thought how wonderful it would be for people to say nice things about me. I thought how interesting it would be for people to cry over me. For people to care. I am missing that right now. Sorry to have to say that. I know I need to snap at of it, and I will. I always do. It is us creative types. Sorry if I brought you down. Okay, back to me. If anybody has a PayPal acct., please go on and send me some money. My acct. is durst11@gmail.com. Thank you. God has a plan for me. He is teaching me things every day. I just wish I could graduate from my lessons.