Respecting Others

I like people. I think that most people are good. There are some people who like to show off or try to take advantage of a situation, but for the most part people are basically good.

My parents taught me that we should treat all people the same. I can remember the days of segregation, but my parents didn't see color. They saw individuals. The first time I saw separate rest rooms was on our trip to California. We stopped at a gas station, and my father explained why there were two rest rooms for men. I also saw it at the movie theatre. There was an entrance for black people and another one for whites. It didn't make much sense to me. My grandmother was one of the first teachers in Alabama to teach black children. The class was at a different time than the white kids, but she knew that everyone needed an education, no matter what the color of their skin. Some people in the community didn't like her doing that, but my grandfather was a judge, so he protected her. Some in my family have had black cooks or maids and have treated them as one of the family. It is all about respect.

When I was in college, there was a blind student named James. He was black, and I was one of his readers. James was very intelligent. One Sunday, I invited James to go to church. When we got there, we were met by the ushers at the front door who would not let us come in, because James was black. James told the men that he was blind and couldn't see what color they were, so the ushers let us sit in the balcony. The next Sunday, James took me to his church, and I was welcomed with open arms.

That's what life in the South was like. Things have sort of eased, but there is always somebody with an attitude or an agenda who wants to press some buttons. It doesn't have to be a black man. White people like to cop an attitude, because they think they are better. Some black people cop an attitude, because they feel they have constantly been on the defensive and need to lash out.

I was working at Belk in Men's Shoes in the late 1980's. An official with a predominantly black organization brought in his son one Saturday to buy shoes. It was a very busy day, and I didn't know who was next. The man lashed out at me and called me a racist for not waiting on him next. I apologized, but he wanted to have me fired. He asked my name. When I told him, he backed off, because he knew my brother, who had been hired by the man to write his five-year plan. My brother had asked me to research and write it, which I did. I didn't have the heart to tell the man that I had written his plan. But, I think he was trying to show off in front of his son.

People, who don't know me, tend to think of me as an aloof, uncaring individual. Nothing could be further from the truth. I like being around people. I don't care what they look like, as long as there is respect involved. I have gone out with black women, as well as Asians, Hispanics, and whites. Others may frown on it, like the time Gwen and I thought we were going to be attacked in Batesburg. But, we made it out alive and had a good laugh.

My wish is that others would treat me with the same respect. After all, the world is a rainbow.